Bridges, Not Battles: A Path to Healing What Divides Us.
Martin Luther King Jr. once marched under a banner that read:
“Men are not our enemies. If we kill men, with whom shall we live?”
He was joined in deep moral and spiritual conviction by his friend, the Vietnamese Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh. Both understood something that much of humanity still struggles to grasp to this day: Our enemies are not other people. Our enemies are hatred, anger, resentment, fear, and discrimination.
This insight is not only timely — it is timeless. And it is perhaps one of the most urgent messages our world needs to hear and integrate today.
We live in an era of polarization, conflict, and increasing dehumanization. People are quick to point fingers, to draw lines, to categorize others as “wrong,” “dangerous,” or “the enemy.” Social media feeds on outrage. Politics thrives on division. Even in families, teams, and communities, we sometimes fall into the trap of us vs. them.
But what if — instead of directing our frustration at one another — we turned our attention inward and asked: What is really driving this conflict? What emotions, what wounds, what fears are standing between us?
Both Martin Luther King Jr. and Thich Nhat Hanh called us to a radical kind of courage: the courage to love in the face of hatred, to understand in the face of fear, to be still in the face of outrage.
This is not passive. This is not weakness. This is the kind of inner strength that transforms cultures, bridges divides, and heals generations.
It applies not only to war or political conflict — but to every aspect of our lives:
In relationships, where resentment silently builds — can we see the fear or unmet need behind it?
In leadership, where power struggles emerge — can we recognize the ego’s need to be right and choose collaboration instead?
In teams, where tension rises — can we replace judgment with curiosity and seek to understand?
When we realize that anger and fear are the real enemies, we can shift from defensiveness to dialogue. From blame to responsibility. From division to connection.
This shift doesn’t happen overnight. But every time we respond to conflict with compassion, we plant a seed of peace. Every time we choose to listen instead of label, we dissolve a layer of fear. Every time we remember the humanity of the person in front of us — even if we disagree — we take a step toward a different kind of world.
The world these two great peacemakers dreamed of.
So today, I invite you to carry this question with you: If we kill men, with whom shall we live?
And may we each commit — in our own lives and leadership — to stop fighting people… and start addressing what truly separates us: the enemies within.
Much love, Barbara.
For more information about my work: https://www.barbaravercruysse.com/
